Shloma, beautiful daughter of Israel!

Have you read 12 Silent Ways to Blow Your Husband’s Mind (for free)? If not, jump there before continuing this post!

In it, we covered 12 ways wives can impress their husband’s with intentional action. To date, it’s the most viewed post on The Hebrew Housewife, and it’s no secret as to why:

You ladies are beautiful women who love your husbands and are so devoted to your marriages that you seek every opportunity to improve! (And I’d like to think the list was fruitful)

So, I’ve been moved to share a second round of tips with you wives and women who aspire to be wives, or even brothers who are looking for ways to encourage their wives to be more intentional!

Before we begin, I want to let you know about Nurture His Masculinity: Honoring Your Impact On Your Husband— it’s an in-depth guide about masculinity, what it means to your marriage, which behaviors destroy it, and how you can nurture it in your husband. AND A FREE EXCLUSIVE BINGO CARD that is tried and true.

If you’re looking for even more ways to blow your husbad’s mind, I suggest you visit that post and take a few notes!

Here are even 12 More Ways to Blow Your Husband’s Mind!

1. Put Your Home First

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of YAHUAH be not blasphemed.”

Titus 2:4-5

Have you ever been to someone’s home, and could easily see their priorities lied elsewhere? When we’re not putting our homes before leisure or work, then it isn’t hard to tell.

The toilets aren’t being cleaned, the sink overruns, the blinds need dusting, the oven hasn’t been scrubbed since it was first bought, clean clothes aren’t stored away… little things are being neglected. Little things that jump out when they’re forsaken.

No husband wants to have family or friends over when his home is neglected, and he is depending on you, his wife, to keep things orderly and make a good impression on anyone he invites into his safe haven.

2. Prioritize Spending Time With Him

And the HAYAH said, It is not good that the man should be alone…”

Genesis 2:18

Yah saw the light, the water, the earth, the animals, the moon, the stars, the sun, and said “Very good.” But when He looked upon Adam, He said, “Not good.”

Why? Because Adam was alone. Humans were not created to live in isolated bubbles, especially married people. As a wife, you don’t just help your man work, you also help him rest and have peace. Sometimes peace looks like just being near to him when he wants you near.

If he makes plans with you, finish your tasks early so you can prepare yourself. If he invites you to spend time with him while you’re in the middle of something, stop what you’re doing, even if it’s important, and come to his need.

You please Yah and you please your husband when you prioritize your marriage, and there is no sweeter reward than to be and have a friend. Just like we can tell when a home is neglected by the little things, we can tell when a marriage is being neglected, too.

Forsaking opportunities to spend time with your husband is a recipe for an unsatisfied husband who will find company somewhere if not from you, and you don’t want that! Be available!

3. Refuse to Believe Anything Negative About Him

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

Philippians 4:8

You could be the quietest, sweetest, most submissive woman on the planet but if you secretly despise your husband in your heart, you won’t be able to hide it forever. And when it is exposed, it won’t be pretty.

Accept that your husband is a human being, like you, and choose not to dwell on his shortcomings. Instead, dwell on what’s thorough, just, righteous, pure, lovely, praiseworthy, holy and virtuous within him.

Seeing your husband in a positive and holy light can also effect the way you support his leadership or accept his rebuke/correction. A woman who sees her husband in darkness will be secretly bitter, angry, and resentful towards him when he leads or corrects her. But a woman who sees him in Light will be joyous, faithful, and honorable when he leads or corrects her.

Your husband will notice, even when you think he won’t. This type of honor isn’t something you can fake, nor is it something you can hide. Rebuke outside voices that insult him, including family and friends, and if you need to, point out one thing EVERY DAY that you love about him so you can rewire your heart; lastly, PRAY for Yah to soften you and help you see what He sees in your Head/husband.

4. Follow His Lead In Study & Prayer

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto YAHUAH. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as HaMashayach is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto HaMashayach, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Ephesians 5:22-24

This applies to the next two points, but disagreement is normal. But that doesn’t mean arguing is acceptable– ESPECIALLY when the Word is coming out.

Women are to be silent and receptive while our husbands lead Scriptural study and prayer.

I used to pray aloud as my husband prayed. “Yes, Father.” “Mhmm!” “Yes!” “Thank you, Abba!” “Praise Your Name!”

Until, The Holy Spirit showed me it was out of order. Not because I was joining in prayer, but because i was audible while my husband was leading us, and i was potentially causing a distraction. Since I’ve stopped, I’ve seen his ability to pray as a warrior dramatically increase, Halal Hayah!

You won’t always like what your husband has to say regarding spiritual matters, but that’s still your lord, your head, and your Chief. You are called to submit in ALL things just like you would if he were The Most High.

Ask questions when you don’t understand, request that he simplify something a little more, but don’t interrupt, don’t object, and don’t insert your own opposing doctrines or narrative– even if it’s “right”.

It’s never right to usurp authority over your husband. Follow his lead.

5. Seek Him When You Want to Make a Decision (Even a Small One)

This is what wives call proactivity! If you’re thinking about changing the type of trash bags you guys use, the dish soap, picking out new bed sheets, clearing out the fridge/freezer, or even changing your hairstyle… seek your husband.

For a few reasons:

1. He might not want you to do that, or may want you to do it at a later time. Seeking him first can avoid mishaps and “You should’ve asked me first!” “I liked it the way it was!” “Why didn’t you let me know?” “I had planned on using that!”

2. It gives him preference– this is called ‘being discreet’. To be discreet means to offer something at discretion, preference, subtly with tact, care, prudence, and delicate consideration. It shows him that you care about his opinion, and that you are eager to please him.

Your husband not only wants to have a say-so in every part of his home’s order– it’s his divine right as the appointed family authority. What kind of ‘head’ doesn’t know what’s happening to the body? Doesn’t the head house the brain– the powerhouse that controls ALL functions? Treat your husband as such and watch him become eager to protect and provide for you.

6. Trust & Encourage His Leadership… Especially When You Don’t Want To

Again… subject in all things. But being in subjection is so much more than being soft-spoken, agreeable, and obedient.

Submission means under (sub-) the same assignment (mission). How can you help your husband with his assignment when you don’t believe in his decisions, don’t encourage him to be bold in his decisions, and you won’t actually put forth effort because…well you just don’t want to?

True submission comes forth when we decide to let go of “me, I, my” during moments when we feel most afraid, intimidated, or skeptical about our husband’s leadership. It’s easy to submit when your husband is making a decision you’ve been wanting him to make for months or years. But our ‘submission’ is challenged when we have to abide by our men while they lead the way, THEIR way!

Don’t just nod, smile, and agree. Encourage him, assist him, and pray for Yah to have mercy on him and bless the work of his hands according to His Lovingkindness towards us! Be earnest, prudent, and sincere. No man wants to feel like the blind leading the blind. Bring vision to his plan, and diligent working hands.

7. Have Quiet Time Alone With Yah

But seek ye first the kingdom of HAYAH, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”

Matthew 6:33

Neglecting yourself is neglecting your marriage.

I talked all about this on Taking Care of Yourself Is Taking Care of Your Husband, along with various ways to water yourself. But the most important thing you can do to rejuvenate, revive, and revitalize your marriage is to get some Living Water from The Source.

When you aren’t taking the time to have your own personal relationship with HaMashayach, you’ll be worn out, inclined to sin, and likely anxious about life and all it’s twists and turns. The Word of Yah is the only sifficiency for your soul, and we as wives tend to forget that when we don’t spend quality time in it.

You can’t live up to the Proverbs 31 Woman standard when you aren’t studying Proverbial Women (Sarah, Hannah, Rebecca, Tobit’s wife, Judith, Ruth, Esther, Mary, etc.). It just won’t magically happen. We need regular exposure to that which we aspire to be!

Another great tip is that being in the Word keeps you from looking to your husband to fulfill every single one of your needs. It’s not going to happen. Yes, he can do a lot. But everything and anything ALL THE TIME EVERY TIME? No.

You have an infinite desire for something infinitely perfect. There is only Echad (One) who fits this description: The Most High.

Let Him speak to you in private. Let Him show you ways to be a better helpmeet. Let Him soothe the pain that you’ve been keeping to yourself. Let Him be your father!

Keep yourself Watered by Yah and experience what no man will every be able to give you.

8. Speak Scripture Over Him

So will My word be which goes out of My mouth; It will not return to Me void (useless, without result), Without accomplishing what I desire, And without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it.”

Isaiah 55:11

Similarly, you can’t speak Scripture over your husband if you yourself aren’t in the Word on your own time.

Speaking the Word over your husband is a great way to encourage him when he’s hesitant, advise him on a decision (because The Word covers every topic), soothe his anxiety or fears, guide him back into a relationship with Yah, and even help him build self-esteem!

Simple things like, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made.” (Psalm 139) “The sun shall not smite you by day nor the moon by night.” (Psalm 121) “You can do all things through Him Who Comforts you.” (Philippians 4) are all very simple but POWERFUL ways to build a righteous, bold, audacious, confident, and holy spirit in your man.

Wives are called to tend to the home, and home is where the heart is. You are a rib. What do ribs do? They protect the most vulnerable parts of the body. Tend to your husband’s heart with Scripture, instead of pointing him towards the world when he’s in need. This is the only Good and Honorable response a wife can have when her husband shows her his vulnerability.

Moreover, it’s not enough for men to only hear, “I believe in you.” (although I can’t emphasize just how EXTREMELY important it is for you to tell him that on the regular).

Human words just don’t suffice for some things. Or human advice, human encouragement, human condolences. Your husband needs someone in his life who’ll point him to his Father in all matters. A wife helps her husband have remembrance on The Most High, period.

Your choosing to speak the Word over him could mean the difference between repentance or falling away. Don’t sleep on the power of Yah’s Word! He says, “My Word will not return to me void.” Every syllable of His Word comprises the Weapon That Is Sharper Than Any Two Edged Sword.

9. Usher Him to Bed

Being present when your husband is ready to wind down is so important! The night time is when he rests, when he seeks peace, and for many husbands, when he may seek intimacy with you!

Drop what you’re doing and be there to help him bathe or shower and get moisturized; offer a massage, have a quick little study or prayer session, recap the day, or simply cuddle with him. Remember, it is not good for man to be alone.

The dishes can wait. Your sister can wait. Meal prep can wait. When it comes to your husband, everything can wait. His rest, peace, and discretion should be number one to you.

This was something I learned the hard way. I used to be so preoccupied with this blog, staying up late to write, or using the evening to finish up housework that I should’ve completed during the day. It cost me peace, because even during the moments I was present for my husband, I was still thinking about my work, my blog, my books, etc.

Then, my husband began to suffer sleeplessness, fatigue, and frustration with our sleeping patterns/schedule. And me, well I was anxious, on edge, and always feeling like there was more to accomplish and that I was getting behind if I didn’t stay up late to do this or that.

I began to pray about how I could be a better wife or help my husband have peace at night. The Holy Spirit revealed to me that I needed to play an active role in my husband climbing into bed at the end of a long day. It has changed everything, especially when I get the chance to pray over him before bed.

This is something that seem little, but over the years it means everything to your marriage. This is a special and unique moment that is crucial to your bond, and is a great reoccuring opportunity to create lasting memories and an intimate tradition. You can never go wrong with honoring your chief (according to what is Holy and Just).

10. Remind Him of His Divine Purpose

Sometimes, husbands can get so caught up in their job, their work, their pain, frustrations, or doubts, that they lose sight of what YAH has called them to do and be.

Even if your man never seems to forget his calling, it’s important for him to know his wife hasn’t forgotten!

Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him.”

Isaiah 43:7

Your husband was created to glorify Yah. We all do that in one way– OBEDIENCE. However, sometimes Yah gives us unique instructions to obey. Some people, Yah tells to run for Senator. Some people, Yah tells them to start a farm. Some people, Yah tells them to be a teacher.

Whatever it is Yah has revealed for your husband to do, dwell on that, focus on that, and feed that each and every day. Don’t do things which take you guys further from that task, or distract you from fulfilling that task.

And if you don’t know what your husband’s task or divine purpose is, remember first and foremost that we are created in YAH’s image, and even if Yah didn’t do ANYTHING he would still be amazing, because He Is I Am. Secondly, seek The Holy Spirit to show you what to pray for in order for Yah to reveal it to your family. It may require a fast or separation from others, or it may even shake up your familiar environment. But don’t be afraid. Yah has you covered when you seek Good for His Glory!

11. Immediately Apologize and Humble Yourself After Making a Mistake

A silent wife is a gift from YAHUAH; nothing is worth more than her self-discipline.

Sirach 26:14 (Apocrypha)

Lower yourself, acknowledge your husband when he is correcting you, agree that you were wrong, apologize, tell him how you plan to improve or do better next time, and ask him how you can make it up to him.

I know this probably seems excess, but doesn’t a plain old, “I’m sorry” just seem so… scarce?

When it comes to your marriage, it’s better for you to do too much than too little!

Something that may help you become more inwardly humble when it comes to apologizing, is physically lowering yourself. If he’s standing, then you should sit. If he’s in a chair, you get on your knees before him. If you’re in the car together, you lower your head, etc.

This submissive and delicate body language communicates a few things to your husband but also to your own brain:

“I am humbling myself.”
“I honor you in this moment.”
“I fear (respect) you.”
“My apology is sincere.”
“I’m ashamed of what I did.”
“I’m in submission to you.”

****These are all suggestions based on women in the Word who bowed themselves before their husbands and men in leadership on the regular, but it’s truly up to you how you decide to show your sincere remorse or submission****

When you realize you made a mistake, or when your husband corrects you on something even if you don’t feel it was a mistake, don’t wait a week, a day, or even an hour to say, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I should’ve _______. How can I fix this right now?”

Submission means immediate response, not just when we get ready.

HELPFUL HINT: Don’t provide excuses or try to explain away your “why’s” unless he asks. It’s unnecessary and only sounds like arguing. I know you mean well, but a silent and loving woman is a gift of YAH, and there is nothing worth more than a SELF-DISCIPLINED heart (meaning she consistently takes initiative when humbling herself).

12. Feel Honored to Be His Wife

Even so husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, For no man ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, as HaMashayach does the church, because we are members of his body. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is a profound one, and I am saying that it refers to HaMashayach and the church; however, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Ephesians 5:28-33

You aren’t just a friend, a helper, a servant, or a birthing machine. You are your husband’s flesh, the flesh of his flesh. And that is a gift.

Never forget about the many uncovered, unmarried and/or fatherless young sisters, widows, and whores who PRAY for a man, even if he isn’t perfect. There is a woman out there looking for a man just like yours.

Appreciate your husband stepping up to be a husband, acknowledge how DIFFICULT it is to respond to the commandment to “Nourish and treasure your wife the way HaMashayach nourished sinners”, and see the HONOR in your role as his own personal church.

Being a man isn’t easy, but being a family man is all the much more dynamic! Feel in your heart that you are honored just to have his name, to be of his tribe, to help him as a wife, and to share the same flesh as him. The same flesh he loves and washes, according to Ephesians.

He won’t be absolutely perfect all the time. That’s okay, neither are you. And your husband doesn’t have to have some fancy calling, run for public office, build a school, or speak in front of thousands of people in order for Yah to use him, for his life to be significant, or for you to feel like being his wife is an honor.

The Word says “Whether rich or poor, [a man’s] heart is content, and at all times his face is cheerful [because he has a good wife].” (Sirach 26:4)

Being happy to be a wife is a novice that can wear off. But seeing the honor of your divine appointment in YAH as a wife will carry you through the lack of reciprocation, the lack of gratitude, the nights you cry yourself to sleep holding your Bible, and the moments you feel like walking away.

You might also benefit from: “Why Can’t I Be More Than Just a Wife, Like Her?” | The Value of A Good Wife & 5 Spiritual Disciplines That Will Transform Your Walk as a Daughter of Israel!

It’s my prayer that this post is fruitful to your marriage! Everyone is different, so perhaps everything on this list might not fit your family. But His Word never returns to Him void, and you will see His power when you dive into His Book in search of Him (:

Can you think of any more ways a Biblical wife can blow her husband’s mind? Let’s hear them!

Did you know The Hebrew Housewife released a devotional just for Israelite women?

You can claim your copy here!

What are your thoughts?

Raabasha Alohalani

I’m a little Israelite woman with a little faith in a big Master. Through cultivating a relationship with The Most High Redeemer of Israel, I’ve overcome suicidal tendencies, body dysmorphia, porn addiction, depression, and the darkness of envy! As a wife and a mommy, it is my earnest desire to share love and open a space for Hebrew, Israelite, and believing women alike who want to help build this City on A Hill. Let's discover His New Mercies each day, and take baby steps towards Shemayim!????